ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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