I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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