Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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