My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
