Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
