We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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