ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
