She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize