so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
