i permit you to call me
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I understand Curling. That high.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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