idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Randomize
