ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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