I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
