I got chris browned last night
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize