Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
