apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
