After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
