'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
