you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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