she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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