Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize
