I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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