Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Randomize
