So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
