i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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