are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
