There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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