Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize