HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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