Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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