oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
