So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Randomize
