you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
