They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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