i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
