You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
