i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
