yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
