Plan B is the new Plan A
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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