There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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