none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
