You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Too much gin, very little bucket
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
