Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
