what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Liz is crying about burritos again.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The struggles of a small town man whore
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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