we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
