I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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