Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize