I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
