yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
so let's talk penis.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
