Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
